San Jose Addiction Counseling - Counseling, Counselor, Therapist, San Jose

Sexual Addiction

Sex surrounds us in our daily lives, but we very rarely discuss the possibility of sexual addiction. From the butt-shaking girls in music videos to the next door neighbor’s affair, what happens when the everyday becomes a problem?

An addiction to sex is like many other addictions. People use their behavior to escape negative feelings or to create an artificial high.

Just because sexual behavior deviates from what is considered the norm in society does not mean that it is an addiction. Simply contemplating or even engaging in certain unusual sexual behaviors at different points in your life does not mean you are addicted.

According to The Society for the Advancement of Sexual Heath, asking yourself three questions can help identify whether or not you have a problem.

Have you lost the ability to control your behavior? Do you regularly cross personal boundaries or engage in behaviors you normally would not participate in?
Do you think about sexual activity when you don’t want to? You may think about sex with other people while being intimate with your partner. At work, you find yourself wondering if you can find pornography on the Internet.
Do you wonder if you have a problem? If you think you are engaging in a behavior that may be problematic, that is the first step in determining whether you are indeed addicted.

Other indicators of sexual addiction include keeping it a secret, feeling shame, or having abuse enter into the sexual relationship.

Behaviors of Sex Addicts

Sexual addiction can take several forms. It is not limited to heterosexual males, but includes women and homosexuals as well. Behaviors sex addicts may engage in can include:

Multiple one night stands with strangers
Having more than one partner
Exhibitionism
Voyeurism
Excessive masturbation
Excessive viewing of pornography
Having affairs outside of a monogamous relationship

At some point in your life, you may have engaged in one or more of these activities. However, a person is not an addict until he/she experiences a lack of control over his/her behavior.

Though some sex addicts may become pedophiles or rapists, not all sexual addicts have these tendencies. If you or someone you know feels these kinds of urges, please seek help from a licensed therapist immediately.

Treatment for Sex Addiction

Getting treatment for sexual addiction is important. Sex addiction can lead to risky behavior, raising the chances for unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases. Despite a few professionals who do not believe it is an addiction, there are many forms of treatment available.

In-patient treatment involves keeping an addict at a facility for anywhere from 24 hours to several months. Lots of information is given to a person in a short period of time. The person is out of their element, which gives him/her a chance to break old habits. Therapy that begins at an in-patient treatment center is often continued after a person leaves the facility.

Out-patient therapy can be individual, couples, or marital. For people in a relationship, sessions can be conducted individually with the partner brought in for a certain amount of co-therapy sessions. Out-patient therapy works best when coupled with group support. Group support can be found on the Internet or through organizations, therapists, medical centers, and religious or spiritual centers.

Participating in a 12-step program similar to the one used by Alcoholics Anonymous can also be very helpful. Groups which use the 12-step method include Sexaholics Anonymous, Sex Addicts Anonymous, and Sexual Compulsiveness Anonymous.

While there is no definite cure for sexual addiction, impulses and compulsive behavior can be controlled. To learn more about how counseling can help or to make an appointment, please call my office

It is hard to understand addiction unless you have experienced it.
~ Ken Hensley

Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism.
~ Carl Jung

We must move in our recovery from one addiction to another for two major reasons: first, we have not recognized and treated the underlying addictive process, and second, we have not accurately isolated and focused upon the specific addictions.
~ Anne Wilson Schaef

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San Jose Addiction Counseling.com. Dr. Randi Fredricks, Ph.D. is licensed as a Marriage Family Therapist MFC 47803 and is not licensed
with the California Medical Board or the California Bureau of Naturopathic Medicine. © 2012 Randi Fredricks, Marriage and Family
Therapist, Inc. All rights reserved. Medical Disclaimer and Copyright